Moptop clutched the arms of his seat tightly, staring intently at the large clock above the cockpit of the plane. The Vicar suddenly stood up and walked down the aisle.
"It's the Rapture! It's coming!"
A collective murmur of surprise and nervousness washed through the plane.
"Repent! Repent!"
The clock ticked away until the hour had come. Moptop looked around the plane, and everyone was still there. Nothing had changed. He leapt from his seat.
"HA!" he screamed, pointing at the Vicar. "In your FACE!"
"Sit down," said Cajun Mother, pulling him back to his seat.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Exotic Cuisine
"All right," began Michael Scott, as the group was seated at the table. "I know you're all very hungry, and you'd like for me to put something inside you. The question is . . . what shall it be?"
"Hold that thought," interrupted Moptop, who quickly excused himself and headed into a grocery store to find his meal there. Inside, Heltroy was attempting to steady herself on a skateboard. Before Moptop could inquire as to the nature of this endeavor, Heltroy unsheathed a large sword and pushed off on the board. As she glided across the tiled floor, a man on the opposite end of the aisle pulled a watermelon from a crate and tossed it into the air. Heltroy leaped from the skateboard as she approached and sliced the melon neatly in half.
After watching several more displays of this ritual, Moptop exited the store and wandered aimlessly through the wild hills. He eventually happened upon a path and followed it to a fenced-off pasture, where giant, spiked worms burrowed through the ground and burst out, launching rocks and dirt with every emergence. "Bull-worms," Moptop thought. "I've read about these somewhere."
At his feet, Moptop found a baby bull-worm, which cried like a human baby. "What's wrong, little fella?" asked Moptop, though his concern belied a vague feeling of disgust at the creature.
"I'm so hungry!" wailed the worm.
"Okay, I'll find you some food."
Moptop ventured to a nearby cabin, where he found some vegetables and ham. All the while, he wasn't sure what bull-worms actually ate.
He returned as the worm continued to cry, and stooped down to offer the food. The creature was dissatisfied with this meal, however, and instead latched itself onto Moptop's hand with its needle-like teeth.
"Hold that thought," interrupted Moptop, who quickly excused himself and headed into a grocery store to find his meal there. Inside, Heltroy was attempting to steady herself on a skateboard. Before Moptop could inquire as to the nature of this endeavor, Heltroy unsheathed a large sword and pushed off on the board. As she glided across the tiled floor, a man on the opposite end of the aisle pulled a watermelon from a crate and tossed it into the air. Heltroy leaped from the skateboard as she approached and sliced the melon neatly in half.
After watching several more displays of this ritual, Moptop exited the store and wandered aimlessly through the wild hills. He eventually happened upon a path and followed it to a fenced-off pasture, where giant, spiked worms burrowed through the ground and burst out, launching rocks and dirt with every emergence. "Bull-worms," Moptop thought. "I've read about these somewhere."
At his feet, Moptop found a baby bull-worm, which cried like a human baby. "What's wrong, little fella?" asked Moptop, though his concern belied a vague feeling of disgust at the creature.
"I'm so hungry!" wailed the worm.
"Okay, I'll find you some food."
Moptop ventured to a nearby cabin, where he found some vegetables and ham. All the while, he wasn't sure what bull-worms actually ate.
He returned as the worm continued to cry, and stooped down to offer the food. The creature was dissatisfied with this meal, however, and instead latched itself onto Moptop's hand with its needle-like teeth.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Holocaustic
Moptop walked home, quickening his pace as the wind picked up and the temperature dropped. He glanced at the menacing clouds at his back, but was forced to do a double-take as his body became flushed with anxiety. The largest cloud was shaped like a mushroom.
He started to run, doubting that he'd be able to avoid a nuclear holocaust on foot but determined to give it a shot. Perhaps aided by the waves of force emanating from the distant explosions, he managed to reach his house. One by one, the windows shattered and trees were uprooted. Moptop slammed the door behind him.
"Go away! I don't want any!" he shouted.
He started to run, doubting that he'd be able to avoid a nuclear holocaust on foot but determined to give it a shot. Perhaps aided by the waves of force emanating from the distant explosions, he managed to reach his house. One by one, the windows shattered and trees were uprooted. Moptop slammed the door behind him.
"Go away! I don't want any!" he shouted.
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